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    Most Common Stylistic Mistakes: “On How to Write Good”

    Written by

    Cecelia

    By Marta Hanson. Source: http://histmed.jhmi.edu/hanson/courses/WritingGood.pdf
    I found this on the School of History and Philosophy of Science, University of Sydney.

    1. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
    2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
    3. And don’t start a sentence with a conjunction.
    4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
    5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They are old hat).
    6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
    7. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
    8. Be more or less specific.
    9. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
    10. No sentence fragments.
    11. Contractions aren’t necessary and shouldn’t be used.
    12. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
    13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than unnecessary; it’s highly superfluous.
    14. One should never generalize.
    15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
    16. Don’t use no double negatives.
    17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
    18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
    19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
    20. The passive voice is to be avoided.
    21. Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary.
    22. Never use a big word when a diminutive one will suffice.
    23. Kill all exclamation points!!!
    24. Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
    25. Profanity is for assholes.
    26. Understatement is always the absolute best way to put forth earth shattering ideas.
    27. Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed. [“it’s” = “it is”, “its” = possessive form of “it”]
    28. Eliminate quotations.
    29. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
    30. If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times: Resist hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it effectively.
    31. Puns are for children, not for groan readers.
    32. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
    33. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
    34. Who needs rhetorical questions?
    35. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
    36. It behoves us not to use archaic language. And finally . . .
    37. Proofread every space and letter carefully to see if you any words out.

    One response

    1. Michael Shilman - list of names avatar
      Michael Shilman – list of names

      Hey, Cecelia. I’m terribly sorry, I neglected to look at my e-mail’s failed to send notices, sent on tusday, then my internet fucked up and facebook did’t work either, Am using a different server currently.

      I have however finalized all the people involved and have made arrangements with them. I’ll be helping them bump in their work into workshop showroom on the 27th, 28, and 29 – if its ok with u leigh and michaela, This, I take as my sole responsibility as well as all other tasks including bump out, wall and floor structure etc. etc. I just require a key and a few instructions from yourself. I’ll even buy a few bottles of vodka for my Russian friends (and one just for Leigh, he seems to like it – we’ll also teach Leigh some Russian)!

      I know that what I’m going to write next goes against feminism, however I’ve asked 3 very pretty Russian girls to sell copies of my Zine as well as 50 Dvd’s (Gold coin donation and 20 limited edition DVD’s of all my films $3 each, all profit will be donated to your gallery, in order to pay for at least the drinks (I hope) Plus the girls will walk around and gently guilt patrons into buying to make benifit for workshop showroom – they’re very skilled and all understand the power of marketing, presentation and above all jewish guilt.

      P.S will give you most of the Video showreel, in the next few days except Elle’s work – to be finished around the 20th

      Ok, here are names and works

      1. Elle Radin – digital animation, duration 5 min
      2. Nick Radin – Digital animation, duration 5 min
      3. Em Bjorndahl – one very pretty animation/photo & 1 vid dur 3 min
      4. Erich Flaxman – sculpture, paintings, drawings
      5. Dave McGuinness – four lamp sculptures and himself as art
      6. Michael Shilman – 4 min video and a new 2.5 min transgression
      7. Crasz Bunkwaa – 3 animation videos dur: 1.5 min, 43 sec, 45 sec
      8. Elena Vlassova – 6 large scale (A2) photos
      9. Alex vlassov – Four A3 photos
      10. Jose Andino – one large drawing of a very friendly dragon.
      11. Biljana jancic – massive plastic bag multi-media installation
      12. Marcela Ordonez – marci is making big slug sculptures and soap
      13. Nava Chapman – 3 large scale paintings (I’ll find sizes later)

      Michael Shilman
      Today at 4:18am
      P.P.S I’ll be getting a few more videos around the 20th, however names and tittles yet to be 100% confermed – I’m going for 30 min overall and Biljana has a 3.5 mind video in the show reel that i neglected to mention. Call me ASAP and I hope that your Thesis is well recived. I will ask my God to help you – she owes me one – so it is no problem. Much luck. And please call me I’ve been trying to get into contact with you all week. :(

      Reply

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