So, according to Paul I would make an exemplary American by the way I order food at restaurants and cafes. I happen to love fruit salad but with the way fruit salads are served in Sydney, it is sadly in direct opposition to my equally strong feelings about cantaloupe and honeydew melon. I hate these fruits. With a passion. And for some reason they are the staple bulk filler of any fruit salad. If you’re keen consumer of airplane food like myself, you will notice that the ‘fruit salad’ that accompanies your on-flight meal is invariably a piece of cantaloupe, a piece of honeydew melon and a grape. If you’re lucky, you might get a piece of pale, tasteless watermelon.

In an untypically assertive way (i.e. contrary to my purported passive-aggressive nature) I will always ask for a fruit salad sans aforementioned melons, much to the annoyance of wait staff and chefs. Usually I get a look of disbelief followed by the suggestion that I could pick the melon out myself as it would be unlikely for them to be able to fill my order. Fruit salads are pre-made. However, despite the withering looks from waitresses and the long absences of the wait staff conferring in hushed tones with the kitchen staff about my ‘special’ request, I always, without fail, get exactly what I want. (See above, Jagos, North Sydney- gee wizz it was good.)

So, why would I feel at home in the States? Because I’m a pain in the arse, it seems. I’m that annoying customer that asks the waiter questions about the menu. I request my salad dressing on the side. I want cracked pepper with every meal. I want chili powder and wasabi with my sushi. I have peculiar coffee orders. I ask for my leftovers in a doggy-bag (sure, my dog is having the rest of that tiramisu). I insist on cream and ice-cream with dessert. My god, I even ask for dishes that aren’t on the menu. Is it wrong to ask for what we want?

But unlike a true American, I never tip.

So I guess that just makes me more like a pain in the ass than an American, although depending on who you ask, the two may be interchangeable.

Day 2 of the Food Log (note how everything kind of went pear-shaped last night after the free dumplings and wine)

10am 2 bowls of fruit muesli (some really tasty Whisk & Pin stuff called Summer Muesli actually made tastier from having been stolen from Paul’s supply); 11am fruit salad with yogurt and compote; 5pm soy flat white and fruit bread from St. Honore with red raspberry jam.

Which is just stupendous, I’ve hardly eaten anything! Did I mention I have a cold?